[Propertalk] Proper 9 a 2017 - Part 1

[Robert P Morrison]

Here's Part 1 of my draft for this Sunday - I've had a two week break
with others preaching, so now back into the fray!
Bob

	THE EPISCOPAL CHURCH OF ST. ALBAN, ALBANY  THE FIFTH SUNDAY AFTER
PENTECOST 

	GENESIS 24:34-38, 42-49, 58-67   PROPER 9 a 

	ROMANS 7:15-24a   9th JULY, 2017 

	MATTHEW 11:16-19, 25-30    PSALM 45:11-18 

	 What struck me about today’s readings is how they speak about
coming to terms with who we are, and how we think about ourselves in
relationship with God, how honest we are with ourselves – AND how
forgiving, because, starting from there, this defines how we relate to
others also. 

	 Paul said, “I do not understand my own actions.” 

	 There must be very few indeed who wouldn’t or couldn’t say that
– in the privacy of a closet in their own homes, perhaps. But I
believe that most of us would be incredibly uncomfortable to say that,
say, before the City Council, or even the BAC. To say that we’re out
of control is a really serious admission. It would make our families,
our friends, our pew mates, really nervous were we to say that. It
makes things so – well, unpredictable. And NO ONE likes to be
unpredictable, either to ourselves or to others. Everything within us,
everything within our societies, demands stability, and dependability.
We evaluate one another constantly. We keep a mental file on one
another, whether we admit it or not, so that we can “place” and
“pigeon-hole” one another. We DON’T like surprises! So, if we
have any quirks, we try to hide them as deeply within ourselves as we
possibly can, so that, sometimes, not even our closest friends know
EVERYTHING about us. 

	 Remember that ridiculous, sexist ad line, “Not even her
hairdresser knows for sure!” As if hair colouring were the most
important thing in life. 

	 But here was Paul, close to the last year of his life, and I believe
he was fairly sure that THAT was so; here was Paul, the apostle who
kick-started the Christian Church; Paul, on whom people depended for
support and encouragement; here was the pillar of the Christian
community in his latest letter of advice and help; here was Paul,
writing to those Christians living hidden lives in the capital of the
Roman Empire, saying not only that he messes up, but that sometimes he
doesn’t even know that he’s messing up. 

	 Was Paul crazy? There were and are some who’d have loved to have
pinned that label on him. There were those, both Christians and
non-Christians, who’d have loved to have pulled Paul down a notch or
two, to have spread fake news about his suitability as a leading light
of Christianity. There were those who’d have done anything to have
attacked Paul’s credibility any way they could have, so that they
wouldn’t have to submit to all the things he’d said and written.
They’d have done ANYthing to have undermined his authority. 

	 Yet here was Paul, at the precise point when he was wanting to nail
down his legacy as an ambassador for Jesus, the Son of God; here was
Paul willing to say that he WASN’T in control of himself. And he
WASN’T saying that to imply that God was in complete control of his
life. He was saying that there were things, influences, forces, call
them what you will, that reared their heads within his body, mind and
spirit, and grabbed at him whenever his guard was down, whenever his
mind was wandering, whenever he was thinking about how good it would
be to put someone or other in her or his place. 

	 If anyone knew what it was like to be a Christian, it was Paul. He
came to his faith the hard way. In fact, he’d been dragged off his
horse, kicking and screaming, with thoughts of slaughtering Christians
uppermost on the job resume he carried with him from city to city.
There was NOTHING Paul hadn’t rehearsed and rehearsed to get the
better of, and to eradicate, any Christians who crossed his path. 

	 Yet that blinding light within him and round him brought him to his
knees and, finally, gave him the eyes of faith. Filled by and with the
forgiving and cleansing Spirit, Paul reassessed and rearranged his
life so that he could faithfully, forcefully, yet lovingly bring
people to believe in the Jesus whom he’d come to know and
acknowledge. 

	 Why would Paul, having gone through so much, and having made such a
huge commitment, not simply to follow Jesus who taught such
compassion, and love, and understanding; why would Paul who wanted
also to bring everyone he possibly could to believe in Jesus and join
him in the task of renewing and refreshing the world; why would Paul
have admitted so publicly that he messed up so often to the point that
he thought of himself as being out of control? 

	 The other thing about Paul was that he was a Roman citizen, with all
the rights and privileges that meant. He would have been able to hold
his head high in all but among the most elite in Roman society. He
would have been their equal, so this would have meant that he had to
couch his Christian message very carefully so as not to offend or lose
the support of anyone. 

	 With all this on the line, then, we come back to the same question.
Why on earth would Paul risk misunderstanding and jeopardise
everything he had tried to do over the past twenty-five to thirty
years? Why would he offer anyone who challenged Christianity’s
message of justice and peace for everyone an opportunity to discover a
crack in the arguments and character of its chief apostle? 

	 But Paul was nothing if not careful. Not only did he know himself,
but he knew others equally well. He was aware of whom Jesus hoped to
reach. 


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