[Propertalk] Fwd: [propertalk.topic] Sermon for Proper 22B

[Joe Parrish]

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-----Original Message-----
From: Judy <judy_boli at ecunet.org>
To: Propertalk <propertalk.topic at ecunet.org>
Sent: Sat, Oct 6, 2012 9:45 am
Subject: [propertalk.topic] Sermon for Proper 22B


Dear Friends,

This Sunday’s sermon is entitled “A Heart Like Yours- CeCe Winans” or
“WWJD (What Would Jesus Do)- NOW?” and deals with the Old Testament
lesson (Genesis 2: 18-24) and the Gospel (Mark 10:2-16).  Here it is:

Did you hear the story of the little boy who was fascinated by the old
family Bible that sat on the living room coffee table?  One day as he
was fingering through it, something fell out of the Bible.  He picked
it up and looked at it.  What he saw was an old leaf that had been
pressed in between the pages.  “Mama, look what I found!” the boy
called out.  “What do you have there, dear?” his mother asked.  With
astonishment in the young boy’s voice, he answered: “It’s really old-
I think it’s Adam’s underwear!”  That’s who we heard about in that
extremely ancient story from the Old Testament book of Genesis- Adam
and the creation of Eve.  Did you notice some basic teachings about
marriage?  An ancient Jewish tradition points out this truth about Eve
and her relationship to Adam: “Not from his head to lord it over him;
not from his feet to be lorded over; but from his rib (next to his
heart) to walk side by side as a partner.  Did you notice that the
Bible describes them as “one flesh?”  This tells us that marriage is
not the ceremony (because there was none), but the coupling- mind to
mind, heart to heart, body to body that constituted the marriage.  The
logical extension of this is that if you are in a sexual, loving
relationship with someone (especially if you have a child by that
person), you are also married to that person.  These days most people
who think they’re single have actually been married a number of times
in God’s eyes.

Another story: did you hear about the conversation between God and
Adam?  God asked Adam, “What’s wrong with you?  All I see you do these
days is mope around.”  Adam said he didn’t have anyone to talk to.
God said he would make a companion for Adam, and the companion would
be a woman.  God said, “This person will gather food for you; and when
you discover clothing, she’ll wash it for you.  She will always agree
with every decision you make.  She will bear your children and never
ask you to get up in the middle of the night to take care of them.
She will not nag you and will always be the first to admit she was
wrong when you’ve had a disagreement.  She will never have a headache
and will freely give you love and passion whenever you want it.”  Adam
asked God, “What will a woman like this cost?”  God replied, “An arm
and a leg!”  Adam commented, “That’s way too expensive!  What could I
get for a rib?”  The rest is history!  He got Eve.  He got trouble.
He got woman, actually woe-man!  That’s what I’d like us to look at
for the rest of our sermon- the potential trouble men and women can
get into with their relationships, and – since Jesus specifically
addressed it in today’s gospel- divorce.

Did you notice what Jesus said?  NO DIVORCE, and REMARRIAGE AFTER
DIVORCE PRODUCES ADULTERY.  Those are really harsh words, and they
seem to have absolutely no “wiggle-room.”  How is it then that the
Episcopal Church allows divorce plus remarriage after divorce (with
the permission of the bishop)?  Is it because we’re not a Bible-
believing church?  Not true!  We read more Bible lessons than most
denominations (usually four).  We ARE a Bible-believing church and try
to live that way.  We are also an honest church.  Most churches work
hard to find loop-holes to allow for divorce.  Some don’t allow
divorce but do declare annulments to marriages, including many with
children.  Some look the other way when members get a divorce and then
go before the justice of the peace to get married.  Many don’t manage
to notice when members “play around”- and you know as well as I do
that many a pastor is considered a “lady’s man.”  We Episcopalians
work and struggle to have a livable Bible faith.  While others seem to
ask the question: “What DID Jesus do?” we ask what WOULD Jesus do if
he lived now, here, in the 21st century?  To do that, we need to start
with what it was like living when Jesus lived, because this will give
us a clue why he said what he said about divorce.  From that- with the
Spirit’s wisdom to guide us, we can think through what he would
probably say and do today, because it’s clear that marriage and
divorce in the first century are not the same as marriage and divorce
in the twenty-first century.

Here are the facts about life, marriage, and divorce in Jesus’ time:
6)	Marriages were not instituted by the couple falling in love.
Marriages were arranged by the parents involved.  This means that for
a man to divorce his wife was to dishonor his parents, who had chosen
the wife and contracted for her purchase (bride money- remember, we
women were owned by our men).  It broke the 5th commandment (“Honor
your father and your mother.”)
7)	Marriages were between two extended families, not two individuals.
When a male from one family and a female from another family were
offered in marriage, it was frequently for social, political, or
economic reasons; and the two families became one united family.  When
a man divorced his wife, it separated the family into two usually-
feuding groups.  Bloodshed often followed.
8)	While Roman law allowed a woman to divorce her husband as well as a
husband to divorce his wife, Jewish law did not allow women to divorce
their husbands.  Only husbands could divorce wives.  (Remember- Jesus
was a Jew speaking to Jewish men.)
9)	It was easy for a man to divorce his wife.  In some periods of
history, all he had to do was say three times- “I divorce you” and
that was it.  By Jesus’ time, a written statement that you are not my
wife and I am not your husband was all that was required.
10)	There was no welfare system- no safety net- in Jesus’ time.
Divorce was extremely cruel to women and children, as is pointed out
in the Old Testament book of Malachi (2:13-16) God said, “You cry
noisily and flood the LORD'S altar with your tears, because he isn't
pleased with your offerings and refuses to accept them.  And why isn't
God pleased?  It's because he knows that each of you men has been
unfaithful to the wife you married when you were young.  You promised
that she would be your partner, but now you have broken that
promise....The LORD God All-Powerful of Israel hates anyone who is
cruel enough to divorce his wife. So take care never to be
unfaithful!”  How was divorce cruel?  A woman had to be under the care
of a man all her life or she and her children had no means of
support.  When a husband divorced his wife, she had five choices: she
could try to get her father, brother, or other male relative to take
her and her children into their home; she could prostitute herself;
she could steal; she could sell herself and her children into slavery;
or they could starve to death.  No wonder Jesus prohibited divorce!  I
would too!  It was a justice issue!

What about today?  An internet pastor-friend wrote to say that a
member of his congregation came to him in tears.  She had endured an
extremely abusive marriage for years, but now her husband had started
to abuse their small son as well.  Looking for a friendly shoulder to
cry on, she confided in her sister that she was planning on divorcing
him.  “Oh!” said her sister in horror.  “You can’t do that- you’ll go
to hell!”  My friends, my question to you is not what did Jesus say in
those ancient circumstances when women were just about owned.  My
question to you is what WOULD Jesus say to do in today’s
circumstances?  I cannot believe he would expect women and children to
stay in abusive situations, because women can now care for their
children- alone if necessary.  It’s not the best way, but better than
being continually mistreated.  Don’t get me wrong.  There is no such
thing as a good divorce.  Divorce causes pain, disunity, confused
children, economic hardship all around.  But when hardness of heart
causes the death of a relationship with the accompanying back-biting,
sharp tongues, disloyalty, and potential violence; divorce is often
the best of a bunch of bad choices.  Is it what God intends for our
marriages?  No.  Is it often the result of living is a sin-sick
world?  Yes.  Is there life in Jesus after divorce?  Most certainly.

May God bless us all as we continue to allow his Spirit to turn our
hearts of stone into the heart of his beloved Son; and may we live our
lives asking, “What WOULD Jesus do this time?”

For anyone who is interested, this sermon and updated African-American
wisdom statements either is or will be posted on our parish web site.
The address is: http://www.stpaulsepisag.com .

Blessed preaching,
Judy Boli
St. Paul's Episcopal Church
Saginaw, Michigan

 
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